what the hell.. is up with TWILIGHT?! I don't even know where to begin! In normal circumstances, I read a book I don't like and move on. But this shit keeps slapping me in the face everywhere I look! Only cool people have Twilight STATIONARY?! Obviously my curiosity got the better of me and I actually read Twilight. All. Four. Books.
To briefly explain, Twilight is censored vampire erotica for pre-teens as told by a Mormon. Not kidding. She writes about as good as a preteen too. And let me tell you, I have never read anything more blatantly sexist.. it even trumps books that are supposed to take place when women weren't allowed to vote. It's about two lovebirds: Edward the 100 year old vampire virgin and Bella the 17 year old bane of my existence. They have no interests, no hobbies, no friends.. they just love each other because he likes the smell of her blood and she is the most insecure woman to ever exist. She validates her life by his presence. She has no goals for herself other than to become a vampire so they can love each other for their entire immortal existence (!!!!!)
What pisses me off the most is that this is what most girls reading it (ages 13-18) think love is. They traded in mutual respect, commitment, friendship and attraction for the less used model of OBSESSIVE CRAZY.
The only thing Edward says (paraphrased, though sadly not by much) : "I love you.. I love you.. I'm so angry at myself for putting you in danger.. I must flee forever into the abyss to hide my shame. You're better off without my chiseled features and controlling existence. Allow me to protect you from afar, feeble minded female mortal."
The only thing Bella says: "I love you so much it hurts my weak mind. I feel dizzy and my woman legs can't carry me. Lift me, oh strong protector of the night."
AND A DIRECT QUOTE: "Maybe my brain will never work right, at least I'm pretty now" -Bella, on becoming a vampire. I just don't understand this bizarro feminism with mormon undertones. She lets this vampire walk all over her and control her life, but then when he knocks her up and the baby will 99% KILL HER.. he respects her choice to have a risky pregnancy? WHAT?!
And the movie was just close-ups of their faces for two hours in various intense expressions.
EFF MINUS! (F-)
Furiously yours,
Stef
3 comments:
I agree! I couldn't finish the first book, terrible writing, boring, Bella is a sap and Edward is a louse. I don't get it! I can't believe adult women were fans.
It's not Twilight or Miss Meyer per se that is mystifying, but the phenomenon. But that's easy enough to figure out.
She simply wrote a story, a non-complex fantasy, that for various reasons struck a chord with enough women flicking their beans in bathtubs across the world. And sure, she got a good book/movie deal because her publishers did their research and saw it would sell well. She's a smart business woman, I'd say, non?
Twilight shows what's popular in a broad enough group of millions of women. I wouldn't bet that all, especially the older female readers, think it's a realistic portrayal of anything. (It's about vampires, hello!) Young impressionable girls will learn the realities of relationships soon enough. It's fantasy, light erotica as you even say. Even a bad fantasy usually trumps a boring reality. Much like porn among men, it's an exciting temporary escape, not an expectation for reality or even necessarily a desire.
Have you seen this? You should watch it -- kind of a bit hilarious but it goes with your post.
Plus, added bonus --- it's Buffy-tacular ;)
- Natalie
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZwM3GvaTRM
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